Who am I? An answer to a "fan" email

I recently received an email about my review of Dead Moon Rising. I will not bore everyone with posting it here. If you need an example visit any IMDB message board, it will be about the same context and difficulty to read (I will admit I am very poor in grammar but what I write is at least legible enough to read). This email did do one thing correctly and that is getting me to think about the last sentence which I will cut and paste:

"....who are u 2 said what flick good or as bad." Like I said I'm not posting the entire email because if you can imagine reading 5 paragraphs of run on sentences that look just like that, you could understand why I have such a headache.

But it is a good question, even if it is presented in a manner that resembles a toilet log. What gives me the right to say a movie sucks or is great? I am not a journalist, I am not a member of the screen actors/writers guild and other than the occasional promotional copy of movies in the mail I am not even that in touch with the right people in Hollywood, though I think my internet service provider has connections to Bollywood. After all that I still do not have an answer to the question, sure I could go the route of stating the fact that I pay for Netflix and my local video store or hell even mention the freedom of the press/speech that the United States Bill of Rights provides. That would be an easy out, but like my ex-wife always said I never do anything the easy way.

I am a movie reviewer. I am not a critic, I am not a blogger (yes I use a blog). I have been writing reviews for about 10 years. I have been watching the specific genre of Horror since I was 7 years old so I have 20 years experience watching good gory and brutal horror and have discovered over time what I like and what I do not like. I am not your average movie goer that goes to the theater once a week and sees the latest and greatest flick, I am that guy you see at your video store that goes through all the old movies looking for something original. I am the guy that has suffered through so many below "B" flicks hoping for a silver lining that I can quote the most obscurest of flicks on a whim.

For every 20 flicks I catch in a given month only a few get reviewed and the others are saved for a rainy day. I am not your average reviewer that writes about the latest movie out hoping to get views either, sure I reviewed Zombieland but zombies are my thing and any chance I get to write about them is a plus. I like to discuss obscure horror, I love the topic so much that one of my good buddies is @ObscureHorror on twitter (plug).

My knowledge of films has helped solve many a bar room bet and a week doesn't go by that I do not get a text message asking for a film recommendation. I don't know that if it gives me the right to bash a movie or not, but I sat through the flick and I should be able to give my opinion to anyone that wants to read or listen to it. The tagline for Southern Fried Horror used to read "Saving the common man from watching bad flicks, by watching it ourselves". I like that idea, if I can stop someone from watching a movie based on my opinion I feel I've done a good service but only if that person trusts my opinion. Later tonight I plan on releasing a top 25 list of my favorite films and explain why, this should let everyone know who I am, because I think you can tell a lot from a person based upon the type of movies they watch.

Commentary on the Horror Genre

With the release of Trick R' Treat and Paranormal Activity coming out nation-wide (maybe) it made me start thinking about why two great looking films have such a hard time getting distributed when garbage such as the Saw franchise, Quarantine [REC ripoff] and going back just a bit to when The Ring and Feardotcom were released. I think I have come to a conclusion and I think that there are two people to blame.

The first is the mindless drones that go to the movies every weekend and don't really know what real horror is are the ones paying for it. I am sorry but Saw is not horror, its the same movie over and over again. I would say quit wasting 9 bucks every Friday night just so Lionsgate can make a few more millions, but since they do produce many of my favorite low budget straight to DVD flicks, please continue but only on one condition. Stop saying Saw is the scariest movie you have ever seen. Please educate yourself some before you base an opinion of what scary is or isn't.

The second group is the "I wont see a foreign flick but I'll shill out for an Americanized version". The Ring was great when it was Ringu, Quarantine was great as REC and even though it hasn't even been filmed yet and I'm sure it will sell millions at the box office Fish Head was better as Let the Right One In.

On the same note please for the love of God, quit wasting money on remakes that have to pass the MPA boards. The gore is watered down, the acting is not the same and the spark of imagination is gone. We know what happens and it was better the first time. If Hollywood stops seeing revenue they will move on to another way of making money.

Does this mean all remakes are bad? No, I frankly did not care for the Halloween or the Texas Chain Saw Massacre remakes but others discovered the past movies. Does this contradict the second point I made? A little, I will admit but to not bother to see a foreign flick because of subtitles is a shame, hell if you have to use the English dub version its not my cup of tea but it will open your eyese up to what horror should be.

Blood, Guts and Gore are not the only reasons for horror to be edgy. Yes Jason butchers people in bloody ways and yes Leatherface saws off limbs with his trusty chainsaw; but the real beauty is how it is done. American horror has forgotten how to be original and creepy. Psycho still stands out today as one of the greatest horror movies in my mind and the only blood and gore that stands out in my mind is the chocolate syrup going down the drain.

American Horror can be original and still score at the box office, check out Vacancy (which opened at number 4 and grossed 7.6 million) or even Jeepers Creepers (which grossed 34 million in its entire run) these were original ideas and they made money. Hollywood needs to stop green lighting remakes and pump money into originality. I shudder to think of what the next 20 years will bring us in America Cinema. Already green lighted is remake (of a remake) of Romero's Night of the Living Dead, as if remakes hadn't already killed the franchise. The only real remake that excites me now is the renewal of the Nightmare on Elm Street but I'm not holding my breath here either.

Please I welcome comments even hate mail. Reviews are reviews and hell I should know I am a reviewer.